Ethan's Age

Friday, April 16, 2010

Moving Forward, at last! (AND A CONTEST!)

Earlier this week, I met with a Reproductive Endocrinologist, as I was finally referred to one by my inept doctor. (Henceforth titled "RE" so I don't have to check my spelling every time I write.)

However, it took until last night for the fact that I'm actually going to have an IUI in the next couple of weeks!

The idea that this might actually work is settling in, with a grain of "be cautious of your heart." Normally not a cynical person, I've become one surrounding this issue. I generally take the premise of "don't worry about it, unless you can do something about it" but have been unable to follow my own guidelines.

The thought that I would never become a mother, of my own child, is hard to face. Yes, I want to adopt, and I'm not saying they wouldn't become "my own," but, let's face it... it's a bit different. I was hoping to have a child or two of my own before adoption, but not all doors are closed yet.

Thankfully, the IUI procedure isn't super super expensive like the IVF procedure is. At $300 a pop (ish) we could have an IUI a few times if needed. But, my stomach and my (not gonna lie) ovaries are apparently on a roller coaster the more I think about it. I'm nervous because of my negative experience of the HSG.


With frequent Facebook statuses (statui?) about baby's moving around in stomachs, bothering mothers, morning sickness, I find it hard to just be supportive. It's not that I'm not happy for them. I am. Very much so. (especially for the one or two that had to wait a while because it was hard for them.) But, with all the complaints about what it's like to be pregnant, I want to yell "AT LEAST YOU COULD GET PREGNANT! BE A BIT MORE SENSITIVE!"

But, those are their status updates. I can't complain, because their complaints are valid to them. Enter Cynicism.

Over time, I've moved my infertility blogger friends from the "Infertility" folder in my reader to the "Kids Folder." They graduate in my reader, and I wish that someday soon I too can graduate. I've even stopped reading a few blogs because of the fact that it was just too hard to read about what they were able to accomplish. I, at times, feel that this makes me a bad friend/blogger/facebook status "liker".

So, I spent one more night drinking a margarita and enjoying the fact that I can still enjoy Jon's homemade recipe for it for a bit longer. Next friday I go back the RE to get an internal ultrasound to measure follicle growth, (I think this should have been done MONTHS AGO) and set up a time for the IUI. Who knows, in two weeks, I could be booking my trip to baby town.

Ok all, thank you for following me. I reached 5,000 hits this week, and I'm thrilled! Also, if you refer someone to this site and they become a follower, I will enter you in a contest where i will be giving away a $10.00 Amazon Purchase of your choice! They must let me know who referred them for them to count towards your total! They can either follow me here, or on my Facebook Fan Page. The contest will end April 30th at 11:59.59!

2 comments:

  1. I can't imagine how difficult is to read those updates. You remind me of how lucky I am - even if I can wish away ever getting a complete night of sleep again. Just know that when you do get to finally make your own baby updates, I'm going to be hitting that "like" button like it's no tomorrow. Got my fingers crossed for you!

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  2. Indeed, it is hard at times, but I'm thrilled for you, and will be joining the motherhood realm soon!!

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